We want everyone who attends to be safe, enjoy themselves, and of course everyone should feel comfortable at this amazing conference. As such, we have put together a code of conduct for this event which everyone is expected to abide by.
Be kind to other attendees and speakers. Do not start conflicts.
This is not a singles bar, avoid sexual advances as they often make others feel uncomfortable.
Respect the venue. This is a public library and as such you should conduct yourself in a respectful manner.
Do not sell items or try to raise money at this event. Only the host may do that.
Do not visit the science section of the library. This will be cause for immediate removal.
There will be no shillery. Shillery includes but is not limited to disagreeing with any of the presenters, even if the previous presenter said the exact opposite thing.
3rd party video streams are not allowed. There will be only one stream of this conference. 3rd parties also may not simulcast or rebroadcast the live stream, especially if they plan to make fun of it. Report these activities to security immediately.
If you have high quality audio/video equipment we will assume you are a shillPlease no Echoplex Media shirts or sweatshirts. This means you, Mom!
Please be grateful for the food provided. If you decide to break for lunch elsewhere, you will not be allowed back in.
Please do not show up with Michael J Murphy. This conference has nothing to do with Mariah Carey or a land deal. You will not be admitted if you bring Mr. Murphy.
No laughing unless you are 100% sure that the presenter told a joke. Laughing is tantamount to shillery and will be cause for immediate removal.
Members of CAKU will be weeded out and asked to leave. Everyone has a voice but them.
No photos of empty seats. This is bad for our movement and will be cause for immediate removal.
Please do not count the attendees. There will be hundreds, and you know it!
If you are coming from a local retirement home, please don’t fall asleep. You will be asked to leave if you are sleeping during any of the presentations.
If you have to take a dump, please use the bathroom. This should go without saying.
Please do not rear end the host’s rental car.
No civil or reasonable conversations with the host’s Dad.
No asking where the “Madisonstar Moon Blocked Me On Facebook” shirts are being sold.
No questions about satellite radio.
No one named Carlos allowed. Period.
Please do not shoot down aircraft from the library parking lot. Or anywhere for that matter. This also should go without saying.
Anyone claiming to be Captain Carl will be tased immediately.
The name Matt Landman shall not be spoken aloud under any circumstances. Doing so will result in instant removal and you will be blocked on Facebook forever.
We will not be discussing the conspiracy behind Dane Wigintons shirt(s).
We expect participants to follow these rules not only at the conference proper but also while sleeping on the host’s floor, at any associated after parties, and while in Virginia Beach in general. Let’s put our best foot forward and leave a good impression.